I just looked down at my foot and discovered my sock was off.
I don’t remember removing said sock. This troubles me for a few reasons.
1. I’ve just read a book about a man who sleepwalked during a stressful portion of his life. To the extent that he RAN through a WINDOW one night while ASLEEP. Is my unconscious sock removal the tip of the iceberg?
2. Before removing my sock, I first had to remove my boot. The boot is large. Independently, it weighs about six pounds. I don’t remember doing this, either.
3. My foot is now cold.
Listen, I don’t know the secrets of the universe. Most of the time, I’m not even sure which questions to ask. But I do know one thing: I like being at least semi-aware of my actions.
Earlier today, I got stuck behind a Stream of Consciousness Driver. The SCD, as it’s known in academic circles, drives exactly the way he or she is thinking, in that exact moment. For instance, if the SCD is thinking “Hm,” she will remove her foot from the gas and slow down. In a more complex sequence, if the SCD thinks “Oh! I could have – oops – oh well…hey! Maybe if I –” he will have slammed on the brakes, wrenched the steering wheel to the right, slowed almost to a stop, lurched forward, braked again, then stalled.
The SCD makes me want to rip my eyeballs from their sockets, jump up and down on them, mash them back into my head, bang on the car window and shout LOOK! LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!
We’re hitting up a couple turkeys this year, and I have to say, I really DIG this holiday. None of that gift-giving stressola – all the food coma you can eat. It’s a holiday wrapped around gathering, gratitude, and gorging. Sublime. C is opening a play directly after bird day, so we’re staying close to the nest this year, which I’ve come to love. Let everyone else muscle their way through LAX security. I’m bringing some side dishes, yo.
With a bunch of folks out of town, LA can be almost bearable, traffic-wise. That is, if the damn SCDs stay off the road.